Okay, so I was in a new place this summer, and I suppose it did help. I truly did not appreciate it as much as I should have though, as I had so many bouts of tears! Waking up alone still gets me, every single morning! It takes awhile to get positive again, some days are easier than others. Today is a good day, as I have a lot of good stuff going on in my life now. I am doing Goddess Readings and Reiki on Friday's in a place in Bradley Beach. I love doing readings, it's like therapy to them, and spirit is really helping to guide them through you! I need to get this out more, find more places to do this, have parties, etc.
I also found a part time nanny job two days a week to help pay the bills, which was pretty important. I need steady income, until I can create financial abundance through my other work.
I started another business, "Rays of Healing Reiki" for Dogs! So, busy I am! I created business cards, flyers, etc., for my new business, and have to get out and about and advertise. I will go to the groomers, doggie day cares, etc., and ask if I can put my flyer and business cards out. I have a really good feeling about this, it's just where I should be now, helping to heal the dogs. The Reiki is also really helping to calm and heal so many dogs, so it will be exciting to experience this! It all came about after a Qi Gong class I took, my energy shifted, and spirit guided me to such. The cool thing is my daughter is also a dog trainer, her and her boyfriend, and they have their own business, specializing in board and training agressive dogs! So, once they get a facility, I hope to work there with them a few days a week. This also will keep me in my daughter's life, which I so want to be!
And of course, there is always my writing, my writing which I wish I could do full time! Stay home and get paid for it, for doing what I truly love! So, I am becoming more aware of doing this for an income, and have found sources online that will pay you to write for them, I just need to follow through. And my children's books will always be there, sitting on my coffee table, waiting for me to illustrate, draw, and paint! I pick them up, do work here and there, but also need to make it a priority! So, I am asking the Universe to send me help here, help with getting my books finished, illustrated and published!!
So many dreams, passions, but I still want love, true love. I would love to fall in love again, and get married, and have family around always. Living alone is lonely, living with others is so energizing, and comforting. I have spent enough time alone, time to pander, pray, meditate, and figure it all out! Which none of us will ever do anyway, but I sure have tried. I have done so much inner work, I am done! Done of the tears, the wrongs I did, the blame, the torture. It is time to forgive, forgive ourselves for any and all of it, no matter what it was, it's done, gone, gone forever. The memory always lasts though, so it is good to heal that memory, then let it go. I held on too long, I remember the summer after seeing Teal Swan, how I cried all summer, wasted my precious time away! I wrote all about it here too, too much pain and sadness. Too much idle time on our hands is not so good, we can get caught up in the pain and suffering. Getting out, being alive, seeing the trees, nature, the ocean, good friends, that is what it's about! Life, it's what we make it, what we want it to be. I know that now, and that is why I focus on my dreams, my mansion up North with my daughter in it with me, with my son in his own mansion next to me, on the lake. I just went to visit my daughter again, and she is staying with my sister in law, who owns a gorgeous home, a gorgeous mansion as I like to call it! As I left, I decided this is what I want, a beautiful home like this, where my kids can come and go, friends and family too! My ex husband and I were building a beautiful home, a castle in the woods, and I still dream of that place. So, I want my dream of owning my beautiful mansion, with children in it, to come true! Why not? I have struggled so many years, had money, gave it away to men I should not have, and now want more. I also want a home on the ocean for my husband and I, for all of our family and friends to come stay and visit anytime, where I can write, draw and paint my heart away!
And so it is!
